Building a Strong Marriage Part 2
Understanding and Meeting Each Other’s Needs in Marriage
Sunday, March 2, 2025
I.Understanding and Meeting Each Other’s Needs in Marriage
A. Understanding and Meeting Each Other’s Needs in Marriage
(Eph. 5:21 NIV; 1 Pet. 3:7 AMPC)
1. Meeting each other needs creates and maintains an attraction to each other; and minimizes outside temptations.
2. Common problems with meeting each other’s needs in marriage:
a. Rejection of the inherent differences in the opposite sex.
b. Translating our spouses needs into our language.
c. Selfishness – marriage is about serving each other.
B. 4 Most Important Needs of a Man and How to Meet Them
(Eph. 5:22-24, 28-33b all NIV) “Wives, submit…”
1. Honor/Respect
a. Allow your husband to fail (not destructive behavior.)
b. Confront your husband but let God be the enforcer.
c. (ref. Prov. 31:23) Honor him at the level you want him to be not where he is.
d. Cover his faults and focus on his strengths.
2. Sex (Prov. 5:15-20 AMP)
a. Communicate to your husband that you accept and are committed to meeting his need for sex.
b. Men are visually stimulated.
c. Be more sexual than you feel.
3.Fun and Friendship
a. Make an effort to be involved with your husband in the things he enjoys.
b. Do not mother your husband.
4. Domestic Support at home
a. A man wants a woman who can make a house a home.
C. 4 Most Important Needs of a Woman and How to Meet Them
(Eph. 5:25-27, 33a all NIV) “Husbands, love…”
1. Love (Security)
a. A husband must communicate his commitment to sacrifice by giving himself for her.
~She must feel she is #1 only 2nd to God.
~Be sensitive to your wife’s needs
b. A husband must communicate his faithfulness.
c. A husband must communicate his dedication to provide financially.
2.Love (Non-sexual Affection)
a.Affection is the glue that holds the relationship together. Affection is an environment; sex is an event.
b.To most women affection symbolizes security, protection, comfort, and approval.
~It says “I’ll take care of you and protect you” “You are important to me and I don’t want anything to happen to you”.
c. How to show affection (remember when you were trying to win her)
~She must know that she is #1 to you; sincere “I LOVE YOU’s and “you are so beautiful.”
~Hug & kiss her every morning and tell her you love and appreciate her before you leave the house EVERYDAY!
~Call her during the day to see how she is doing and tell her you love her
~Flowers/gifts/cards on occasion (send them to her job)
~Birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, Mother’s Day and Valentine’s Day.
-Get sentimental gifts not household practical gifts.
~After work, call her before you leave for home, so that she can know when to expect you
~When you arrive home from work, give her a hug and kiss and spend a few minutes talking to her about how her day went.
~Help her with dinner and with the dishes after dinner
~Hug and kiss her every night before you go to sleep
e. Affection is what goes on before and after sex!
f.Call when you are leaving wherever you are!
~Help her with her household chores. (if both of you work, split household chores)
3.Open and Honest Communication
a. Talk about everything!
~Talk about everything like you did when you were dating.
~Share your dreams, goals, desires, hurts, pains, strengths, weaknesses, children, work…
~Make time to talk – in bed, at meals, on the phone.
~Date night
4.Leadership
a. Women don’t want to be dominated or controlled. They want to be treated as equals, but they want their husband to be the loving initiator of the home in four important areas: the children, romance, finances, and spiritual matters.
[Pastor Lee Stokes]